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Posted 2008-08-19, 03:13 PM in reply to HandOfHeaven's post starting "-Spector-'s tolerances are through the..."
Thanatos I'm not lying when I post in here, seriously. My worst addiction is Benzodiazepines, and Xanax falls under that category. People like to call me "Benzo-Bob" and say the same stuff you do like, "You should seriously be dead after taking all of those dude."

I can't take 2 or 3 milligrams, I won't even get a buzz.
I'll try to describe what it's like when I'm really craving them:

You get into a fight with the girl that you really love. The next day she doesn't call you, and you don't call her to try and prove a pointless point to show that you won't break and that she'll call first. The day drones on slowly as you keep anxiously eyeing the clock. You begin to feel a sensation of emptiness and anxiety in your chest, right below your sternum. As the day gets later, the feeling intensifies until you feel like there's a gaping hole in your chest and you just want to SCREAM.

Your world feels like it’s going to be ripped apart, mashed into transcendental primordial soup filled with tears and frustration. You want to be back in your bed, under the covers in the fetal position.

Suddenly the phone rings, a ray of light! All your emotions of anxiety and disappointment have bottled-necked, ready to explode. You reach for the phone, praying to god that it’s her, as you hear the bittersweet voice of a telemarketer.



………………..



Emptiness, loneliness and depression engulf your soul. Now to start the journey over, waiting for that next call.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -



That's a preview of what it feels like.. I don't have the necessary vocabulary to describe the overwhelming agony, It's pretty fucked up though.
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