What to do... *shakes head*
 

So there's this girl, Jenn, that I met a couple of months ago.

We've become really good friends.

I like her... a lot. She brings out a side of me that I really like. I'm more comfortable around her than I can remember being for a long time. I'm naturally funnier and more charming just being around her. She makes me happier than I've been in a good long while.

She's got a boyfriend, Charlie. They've been together like 2 years.

My conundrum: I think she likes me. The signs are pretty good, I think, but I've never been good at picking up things like that, so it's completely possible (upon inspection, highly likely) that I'm misreading these "signs" altogether.

I haven't heard any good things about Charlie from any of her friends. I haven't even heard any good things about him from her, and we've talked about him a decent amount. From what I can tell, he treats her like shit. He neglects her. He skips out on dates she plans. For some reason, she loves the guy.

I'm afraid to say anything to her.

On the one hand, I would be much, much better to her than Charlie is. I know it. I can make her happy.

On the other hand, she has a boyfriend. She says she loves him...

I'd hate to say something to her and then find out that the "signs" I'm getting are just friendship that I've taken to mean more than what they are because of how I feel about her. That would most likely ruin whatever actual friendship we have right now, and I don't want to throw that away...

:confused:

Fuck "signs." Signs don't mean shit. Take this from me, if that has any merit.

Don't get too attached to her. Sure, you can hang out and have fun, but if you start thinking more than one step ahead of what is in front of you, things can be blown way out of proportion. Don't do it to yourself. If she does like you, you'll find out one day.

Although no matter what is said here, you'll still do that, right? Of course... just don't let it carry you away. Perception is reality. You have to keep your head on your shoulders, instead of up in the clouds. If it wanders off, then suddenly small little things turn into parts of a large puzzle... a puzzle that probably doesn't exist.

Like grav said, don't get your hope up too high. If something will happen, it will. I been in this situation before, and i think i rushed shit, and it blew apart,.

I guess you should do something to show your affection to her, alittle bit, just enough to let her notics and see her reaction for it.

Ya, I'm probably too chicken-shit to say anything anyway... I'll likely end up just riding that wave until something happens on her end.

Easier said than done...

I'm planning on cooking for her some time, though. She brought it up jokingly in conversation, and I went with it because I knew it might be a good chance... I dunno for something to happen.

Do it, that's a good little sign to show her you like her.

Not good Bob......if this girl were to actually GET with you then she wouldnt be a girl....she would be a HOR........and what makes you think that in her mind you'll be better than her BF? she will simply mvoe along to the next available guy!

Well, first off, I'm not trying to fuck a girl who has a boyfriend. That simple enough for ya? So her leaving an asshole boyfriend to be with me would not make her a "HOR."

What would make me better than an inconsiderate guy who ditches dates she arranges, fails to call her, shows up late, and generally gives her less attention and respect than she deserves? Let me think... I may need to ponder on that one a while.

Besides, she's not the type of person who "will simply mvoe along to the next available guy." That's why I'm so hesitant to say anything to her. I don't see the possibility of her leaving Charlie as very likely.

This sounds like the situation I have myself in right now. Me and this girl have feelings for each other but she has a boyfriend who is a jackass to her and I'm nothing but positive to her. She loves him and won't give him up but she sees a possible relationship between us. I'm telling ya, Bob, the best thing to do here is stay friends. Be real good friends with her so eventually when the guy pushes her over the edge and she splits with him you're there like you've always been.

Time and girls are a bitch. I'd just say wait it out, and keep on being good to her and stuff, not overly good though.

I was in the exact same situation as Thanatos and Bob in November. She dumped her boyfriend of two years who she "loves" even though he treats her like shit in order to be with me. She says "Yeah I love him, you guys (ridiculers of their relationship) don't see the side of him I do". Bottom line is, the chick is an emotional bag who you may love, but she really is way to involved with her asshole boyfriend to give your relationship a real chance. If she comes out of that relationship and into one with you, she didn't have time to think things through. All your relationship becomes is a comparison to her other one, and then eventually she goes back to him because she is.... once again... an emotional female. There is nothing you can do but wait, and if you don't wait, you will get owned.

This chick wants to get back with me again, once he goes to college. She even has this psycho vision of me and her getting MARRIED. She is very nuts, and completely serious. She is very smart, funny, and a 10. But she has lots of emotional problems. She thinks we are "destined to be married", but we can't be to close at the moment... becuase she "has a boyfriend" HAH. Figure that one out. I can get better poon than that. And if relationships aren't about that, then why can't you just be friends?

She thinks we are "destined to be married", but we can't be to close at the moment... becuase she "has a boyfriend" HAH.

LOL, when i heard that I laugh so hard.

Yeah, that means that she wants to make you think she's interested, just so she can hold on to you for a "just in case."

So, Jenn and Charlie broke up yesterday...

I know that it's a good thing. He treated her badly. She didn't see it as much as everyone else did, but he just didn't respect or value her as much as he should have. She thought it would get better later, because he promised her it would, but he promised her that a lot... I think he's full of shit.

Secondly, if I get my shot, I know I can make her happier than he ever did.

But on the other hand, and it's the big hand right now, it's a bad thing. She's miserable... That's natural, I know. That's how it works. I think that, deep down inside, she didn't want to continue the relationship, and she still doesn't. It just hurts her because it's over.

In spite of that, she's still miserable right now, and I feel bad because she feels bad...

And this is where you let her lean against the rock steady pillar that is you.

Give her a shoulder to cry on, be there for her for as long as necessary and you'll eventually build up a relationship.

I don't know why I'm saying all this, you'll know what is best to do...

Fuck that. Be a little evil now... just for fun. Stop talking to her completely unless she goes looking for you. See what happens...

With what purpose in mind?

Just an experiment to see how much you mean to her...

I don't think experimentation is the best thing right now. She's pretty broken up.

I do need to get my mind off it a little bit, though. She worked 12:00-7:00 today, and it's 8:45 now. For some reason, it seems like I should've heard from her by now, and I'm starting to worry. I know I shouldn't, but...

Here's my advice: turn gay.