The year was 1941. The place: Nazi Germany. I was but a mere Aryan in a sea of lucky Jewish folk who were sent to Candyland to get a free PS2 as promised by the Fuhrer. I couldn't wait to get my hands on a PS2 so that I could play Onimusha 3 with my homies and pwn their sorry impure and non-Aryan asses. As I was walking down Pragha Lane, I noticed a gay strip club called "Hotel Soap." A sign outside read "120 Deutschmarks for the guy that has the tightest ass." It just so happened that EBX was selling a PS2 for 120 Deutschmarks and naturally a young boy of 31 like me would have the tightest ass of all, never having been deflowered or sodomized! I went inside, and met a man named Hans. Hans had large hands, and he used them well. Very well I should say. It is said that Hans worked at a slaughterhouse where he snapped chicken necks all day long. Such passion for neck-snapping was what gave him his lofty appendages. He told me to sign up, and come back at noon.

Noon

I came back, and was placed on a table with with 4 leather straps. Hans came in and strapped me down good. He pulled down my pants, and inserted his penis into my colon. After a good pounding, he gave me 120 Deutschmarks and I went to EBX and bought myself a PS2. Later, I sooo pwnd Grav in Onimusha 3.

Fin.