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-   -   Anti-Masturbation Equipment (http://zelaron.com/forum/showthread.php?t=22295)

zeal311 2003-09-15 06:10 PM

Anti-Masturbation Equipment
 
I was on google and thought that i would look for that one old christian site with all those fake facts about masturbation when i stumbled upon this. The last one is definetly the fuunniest.

http://free.freespeech.org/shockingtruth/antimast.html

!King_Amazon! 2003-09-15 06:16 PM

AM10: Vaginal juices detection cream - £9.99
- apply to hands, underwear or cucumbers to detect traces of vaginal juices
- cream will turn purple if it comes into contact with vaginal juices


I think I just died laughing.

Sovereign 2003-09-15 06:26 PM

WTF LOL. But they left out bananas

RoboticSilence 2003-09-15 07:01 PM

AM02: Anti-erection ring - £99.99
- delivers short, violent shock when penis becomes erect
- anti-handling device prevents ring being removed

Ow.

zeal311 2003-09-15 07:08 PM

The "Helmet of Pure Thought"
This deluxe item is used to eradicate lustful thoughts from the wearer. The helmet monitors brain waves and emits a nausea-inducing low frequency when sexual thoughts are detected. The wearer can be "tempted" with images of a sexual nature by looking into a visor (sold separately).

The perfect item to test whether your child is pure in thought. (AKA Gay)

Kuja`s #1 2003-09-15 07:35 PM

All I can say is WTF.

!King_Amazon! 2003-09-15 07:38 PM

It's for the mormons.

Randuin 2003-09-15 07:52 PM

wow dude... gay is the word for this

Pennywise 2003-09-16 09:54 AM

haha funny stuff you found in there but i don't think they sell that products or
they do?

Eddie_Perez 2003-09-16 10:21 AM

Good for all the compulsive rapists......

J_iceman 2003-09-16 10:37 AM

dam that stuff is gay
i bet if anyone uses these product they WILL soon lose there manhood (balls) using rings???

EX-Mania 2003-09-16 06:14 PM

I was looking for an email to harass them and to tell them masturbation is normal and human and if we werent supposed to do it then nobody would. and OMG nocturnal emission sheets?! wtf!!! tahts totally inhumane.. nocturnal emission is totally natural if u dont wank off.. its a natural process and u cant stop it nomater what.. its like ur heart beating, u have less control over it then even breathing.. its like telling u that human sexuality is wrong... fuck them and i hope they die :P obviously i wank off and so do all of u so no shame in admitting it.. i hope they go to hell for that if there is 1 :p

!King_Amazon! 2003-09-16 06:27 PM

I wank and I'm proud of it.

EX-Mania 2003-09-16 06:32 PM

Hmm, lol well i just read the site cuz i was ready to send them hate-mail but it said the site is a parody and just a joke to see how people react to it.. im relieved cuz everyone wanks off and they probably do too.. so keep wanking jesus loves u all! lolol :p

kaos 2003-09-16 07:24 PM

Lol...nice.

Sovereign 2003-09-16 09:02 PM

Wanking is fun and there is nothign wrogn with it. I support it so much my screenname has the term "Wanker" IN IT.

Anime-Otaku 2003-09-16 09:34 PM

according to the bible its wrong. then again who belives in the bible hahaha. o and


I AM BACK but for how long....

!King_Amazon! 2003-09-16 09:55 PM

I've read the bible and the only thing I remember about masturbation is something like if a soldier emits during the night, he has to leave the battle for the next day and night.

Adrenachrome 2003-09-19 11:42 AM

Nothing could stop me..

Silverjinx18 2003-09-19 12:28 PM

Just think about killing a poor inesent little kitten when you masterbate...that always helps me stop (lol)


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