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Unhappy So.. I kinda need your opinions
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Posted 2007-12-02, 07:18 PM
Okay, so i have this friend. She is dating this guy. This guy just happens to be one of the biggest assholes i have ever met. Like, she spends every waking moment waiting for him to call just so she can be bitched at by him.. He always makes her feel so terrible.. She knows he's not good for her.. but she does nothing about it.. eventually its all gonna get worse right? Any ideas on what to do?
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Posted 2007-12-02, 07:26 PM in reply to Optimistic's post "So.. I kinda need your opinions"
Kick her in the balls and set her straight.

And lrn2read section titles, kk?
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Posted 2007-12-02, 07:26 PM in reply to Optimistic's post "So.. I kinda need your opinions"
Well first off would this friend be yourself?
Second off, the friend shouldn't put up with that shit. I mean, if shes really happy being treated that way, I guess she should stay with him. But i dont know Who would wanna be treated like that. A relationship should try its best to stay positive.... and i know it cant always be that way, but it definently shouldn't keep being brought into a negative shadowed area. Would trust be a problem in theyre relationship?


Sorry, if this dont help
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Posted 2007-12-02, 07:43 PM in reply to MescalinesFrend's post starting "Well first off would this friend be..."
No, its not me. and trust is like, the biggest issue. he just cant stand her being anywhere without him, or else he freaks out. but yea.

Btw, what do you mean leanr 2 read sction titles?

I dont get it..
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Posted 2007-12-02, 07:51 PM in reply to Optimistic's post starting "No, its not me. and trust is like, the..."
Well a relationship usually never works when theres no trust... and he needs to learn to let her live a little of her own life.

And i think he meant that you should have posted this under the "Life discussion" section of the forum (goto the zelaron home page and youll see the categories). But i only THINK thats what he meant....
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Posted 2007-12-02, 07:58 PM in reply to MescalinesFrend's post starting "Well a relationship usually never works..."
Oh. My bad.

But anyways, that's what i keep saying. And i think if she would see it from someone elses perspective it would be different.

I dont know how to show her though..
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Posted 2007-12-02, 08:14 PM in reply to Optimistic's post starting "Oh. My bad. But anyways, that's..."
Sometimes people just have to find out on theyre own.... i wouldn't interfere to much.... usually things just get flipped and your friend ends up hating you or something along those lines...
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Posted 2007-12-02, 08:47 PM in reply to MescalinesFrend's post starting "Well a relationship usually never works..."
MescalinesFrend said:
And i think he meant that you should have posted this under the "Life discussion" section of the forum (goto the zelaron home page and youll see the categories). But i only THINK thats what he meant....
You're correct.

If you're a good friend, Optimistic, you'll sit, talk, and comfort your friend. You may want to try and make her see things your way, but don't try and impose your opinion on her. The best thing you can really do for her is be there when she needs you. Either she'll come around on her own, or she won't. Not much you can do to change that, probably. If you push too hard, you may just exacerbate the situation.

But that's just my opinion.
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Posted 2007-12-02, 08:49 PM in reply to Demosthenes's post starting "You're correct. If you're a good..."
Very well put! Hmmm.... im starting to like this site more and more :-).
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Posted 2007-12-02, 08:50 PM in reply to Demosthenes's post starting "You're correct. If you're a good..."
Sounds good. Gracias mi amigos! (Ha, Spanish)
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Posted 2007-12-02, 09:26 PM in reply to Optimistic's post starting "Sounds good. Gracias mi amigos! (Ha,..."
If she knows he's not good enough for her and yet she does nothing about it, maybe she likes being bitched at and eventually abused if they get any closer.

Or maybe she's ugly and can't find anyone else. But that's just an assumption.
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Posted 2007-12-03, 07:54 AM in reply to Optimistic's post "So.. I kinda need your opinions"
Oh, she's one of "those" girls. You know, the ones that are completely content with being treated like shit. They bitch about it, but won't do anything to prevent it.

Honestly, if you've already talked to her about all of this and she still isn't doing anything about it, she's shit out of luck. Prepare to live a life where you're constantly being talked down to, abused, etc etc. I have no sympathy for girls like this.
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Posted 2007-12-03, 09:41 AM in reply to Optimistic's post "So.. I kinda need your opinions"
Honestly, this sounds a lot like the relationship my sister is in. Whenever she talks to her boyfriend over the phone it usually ends up with him bitching at her. She can't go out to bars with my cousin's and I anymore unless he's there, and he hates bars, so that's out of the question. She constantly has to run everything she wants to do and everywhere she want's to go by him first, and you can tell by her reactions that his responses are rarely ever ones she wants to hear.

The only difference is she is completely unable to see her relationship the way the rest of us see it. We've tried to talk to her about it, carefully, but she came to the BS conclusion that if we hate him, then we must hate her as well.

But the more I look at their relationship, the more it looks like it's actually the kind of relationship she's happy with. And really he's not all that bad of a guy, I get along with him great myself. In the end I told everyone to just back off and let their relationship develop, for better or worse.

If you talk to her and she decides not to listen to you, you'll have to do the same yourself. It's difficult at times, but hopefully it'll end up positively.
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Posted 2007-12-04, 03:16 AM in reply to Demosthenes's post starting "Kick her in the balls and set her..."
mjordan2nd said:
Kick her in the balls and set her straight.
Best advice I've ever seen.

But seriously, lots of young women seem to condition themselves to believe that they actually like having douchebags treat them like shit. I think it has something to do with popular music, but I'm old, so I blame lots of things on popular music.
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Posted 2007-12-04, 07:14 AM in reply to Vault Dweller's post starting "Best advice I've ever seen. But..."
The great thing is this thread is about Sweetesthunni and -Spector-
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Posted 2007-12-04, 08:00 AM in reply to !King_Amazon!'s post starting "The great thing is this thread is about..."
Hmmm....

Dictionary said:

i·ron·ic
Characterized by or constituting irony.
Given to the use of irony. See Synonyms at sarcastic.
Poignantly contrary to what was expected or intended: madness, an ironic fate for such a clear thinker.














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!King_Amazon!: I talked to him while he was getting raped
[quote][16:04] jamer123: GRRR firefox just like quit on me now on internet exploder[quote]
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[quote=!King_Amazon!]notices he's 3 inches shorter than her son and he's circumcised [quote]
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Posted 2007-12-04, 08:11 AM in reply to D3V's post starting "Hmmm...."
I know that in some cases, the female has been brainwashed because being abused as a child, that's all she has to go on. It would appear to be natural to her.
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Posted 2007-12-04, 08:22 AM in reply to HandOfHeaven's post starting "I know that in some cases, the female..."
This thread is not about me and -Spector-. This is my Sister, and she is talking about her friend. We thought the same thing about this, but i talked to her, and no...Its not.
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Posted 2007-12-04, 08:27 AM in reply to Sweetesthunni's post starting "This thread is not about me and..."
Is too.
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Posted 2007-12-05, 02:55 PM in reply to !King_Amazon!'s post starting "Is too."
Yea, uhmm... This is def. not about Sweetesthunni && -Spector-. It is in fact about one of my friends at school. Who happens to be my BEST-Friend. So yea..
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