Fill a rubber glove with equal parts cornstarch, pickle juice, and Windex. Wear said glove while sleeping for three nights straight, not changing the contents no matter how it may begin to smell. On the fourth night, add 4 cloves of garlic to the glove and continue to wear it at night for the rest of the week. (Warning: make sure you use exactly 4 cloves. Any more or less could prove fatal.) Finally, at the end of the week, refrigerate any remaining contents of the glove for 1 hour, then ingest the precipitate.



Or seek real medical advice.