Ummmm, most embarrasing...a person of my advanced age has a lot of those stored up. Heres a good one:

The Year: 1993 I was in Spokane Washington working a summer construction job and I was out drinking at a bar one night. I came out of the bar to get in my car and was so drunk I could barely get the door open and get behind the wheel. Unbeknownest to me there were two Spokane cops watching this and they waited until I started the car before they busted me. I was able to talk them out of arresting me but they did impound my car.

Anyway heres the funny part... As I am walking back to my hotel I pass.....THE SPOKANE COUNTY MUNICIPAL IMPOUND LOT! I am so toasted that I begin to hatch this crazy plan to liberate my 1976 rusty Chevy Nova. I grab a crowbar from one of the work trucks and run back to the lot. I firmly grasp the crowbar and try to break the lock by pulling as hard as I can. Only problem is I am pulling the crowbar TOWARDS my face. Well it slipped out of the lock and I nailed myself so hard between the eyes that I lost conciousness right there on the dirt road. It gets better....
I wake up about an hour later and the same damn cops who took my car are shaking me awake and laughing their heads off....they were in such a fantastic mood from laughing at me that they actually drove me back to my hotel and got me some ice for my head. To this day I have a one inch long scar between my eyes. I look at it in the mirror if I start drinking to much at a party to remind myself not to be a dumbass