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-   -   The scientific theory of ED, or external delivery (http://zelaron.com/forum/showthread.php?t=45568)

Demosthenes 2008-04-29 01:41 PM

The scientific theory of ED, or external delivery
 
What is External Delivery?

External delivery refers to a scientific research program as well as a community of older kids, teachers, and other adults who seek evidence of external sources of Christmas presents. The theory of external delivery holds that certain features of how Christmas presents are delivered each year are best explained by an external source, not an internal source such as your parents.

Through careful study and analysis, Sexternal delivery proponentsists are able to determine the distinct features of presents that don't come from our parents, such as those given by strangers, and then seek to find similar informational properties in Christmas presents. By applying this scientific method, older kids have identified many irrefutably external structures in Christmas presents.

Is External Delivery the same as Santa Clausism?

No. The theory of external delivery is only concerned with empirically testing whether Christmas presents are delivered by an external agent, or an internal agent such as your parents. Santa Clausism typically starts with the premise that Santa Claus is delivering presents, and then seeks to fit the evidence to that theory. The theory of external delivery has developed strictly from objective interpretations of the empirical evidence.

Do Any Older Kids Believe in ED?

Yes. While it is true that the prevailing opinion in the higher grades has traditionally been parentism, a growing number of older kids and adults are breaking away from that paradigm. More than 700 5th and 6th graders have signed our Problems with Parentism list, and more names are being added all the time. New evidence is constantly coming in that challenges the parentist model, forcing older kids to reevaluate their outdated beliefs and embrace the theory of external delivery.

http://edthefuture.com/

-Spector- 2008-04-29 01:49 PM

..... Why?

Mantralord 2008-04-29 01:53 PM

website down, problem automatically solved

Demosthenes 2008-04-29 01:55 PM

Fixed.

Willkillforfood 2008-04-29 01:56 PM

MJ, if you believe in Santa then that's all that matters, sugar. :P.

Demosthenes 2008-04-29 04:58 PM

This week we interview sixth grader and two-time spelling bee champion Sally Smith about why she has signed our Problems with Parentism list. According to Sally, parentism is simply unable to explain the origins of Christmas presents, and the only satisfactory conclusion we can draw is that of external delivery.

We also discuss the case of Mrs. Dover refusing to give Wally Fitzmillen a detention last week when he shouted out his parentist beliefs in the cafeteria where the first graders were eating lunch. She wouldn't even listen to our pleas to make Wally tell the first graders that parentism is simply his opinion, and that external delivery is an equally valid theory. This is just another clear case of older kid and grown-up bias, and their unwillingness to even consider the evidence in support of external delivery.

Be sure to join us again next week, when we look at some famous parentists throughout history, and how their beliefs led them to behave.


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