Snake

I'm always into competition. If I can't beat a score I move on and some have kicked my butt. But every time some one beats me I just try harder. Sometimes I can reclaim it, other times no. That's when I'll quit one.

Using my powers, I fused the lobster and Holmes into one super being, which could battle Godzilla. "Hold them off!" I told my men, as they went to war with Beeeee's. Riding on Lobster Holmes, I leaped off as they too began to fight and landed on top of Godzilla, coming face to face with Beeeee. But it turned out he wasn't who I thought - it was actually... Mdselctr!

He died on contact, as Mdselctr is allergic to reality. And that's how I broke my foot.

The war with grand overlord Beeeee had begun. The people died, the ninjas fled, and all the black people ate watermellon, in fear of Beeeee's fifth e, as in China, five e's the like having 666 in your name. Godzilla, who recently got done with Japan, came to China for a vacation, and they forced him into the war. I was with my friend Sherlock Holmes at the time, time traveling to find a cure for Chuck Norris syndrome.

We found ourselfs surrounded by angry chinamen, who couldn't eat lunch because their chopsticks were made of whiped cream. Using my ultimate win, I was able to help them, and they called me their new king. They told us "our wives don't taste as good without soy sauce, now that war has begun" and I said back to them "bring my a lobster, and the war shall end.", which they did. Beeeee and his army came in, and I could see him riding on top of Godzilla.

Oh, my leg. That's a different story. You see, it was 50 A.D. in China...

I transformed into a power beyond any man of this world - I was level 101! With a single punch, Tom Hanks exploded on contact! With a swipe of my hand, everyone was resurrected. With a fart from my ass, the O-zone was fixed and with the sweat from my socks the desert had rain every month. Peace had come over the world.

And that's how I broke my foot.

John was lying on the ground, broken and bloodied. He clearly had no time left. He looked to me and reached out to me. I took his hand and he told me "Skurai... I have no time left. Take my power, and protect my family!" and suddenly, I started trippin' bawlz. I saw visions and the past, present, and future. I felt the power swell up inside of me, like a black man, and suddenly I came back to the real world. The flaming dragon came at me, and I grabbed him by the shoulders and slammed him against the wall. "Stupid fuck!" I called him, and he exploded from all my win.I turned with a fist and sent Tom Hanks flying all the way to Texas. I returned to England and with the necklace, healed his wife, who thanked me. She mourned over her husband, but was so greatful to me that she let me lay with all 200 of her daughters. That's when Tom Hanks appeared again. "I will not forgive you!" he told me, and soon, everyone was dead.

The man stepped closer to him. "I am called 'Tom Hanks', and I am the guardian of this tomb. You must leave at once, or I shall kill you!" he said a second time, taking a swing at my partner with his rod. Suddenly, John blocked the rod with his bare hand! It was incredible! The rod was bent by the power of John's arm, and jumped in to punch at the man called 'Tom Hanks'.
Tom Hanks dodge, and suddenly his staff burst into flames, and turned into a giant skeletal dragon, which took a swipe at John, but somehow he was strong enough to keep the flaming beast a bay. "Skurai, hurry! Save my wife!" He called out to me. I quickly turned and ran further into the tomb. I had to find the necklace before John and his wife were destroyed!
I saw it. The necklace, attached to giant Anubis statue - but it wasn't on his neck. It was on his penis. Ew. Once I managed to gather the fail, I took hold of the necklace and ran back to the entrance.

Well, you see.

It was 1992, in Egypt. I was investigating the tomb of king Big White Honky, when suddenly, a man in all black appeared. "You should not be here... leave at once!" he commanded, suddenly pulling a staff out of nowhere. My partner, Dr. John Faust, stepped forward. "We cannot! My wife is sick, and the only way to get the cure is to find the mummy's necklace!" which was the reason we were in Egypt.

My leg broke, so I can't use the computer as often. I should be better soon, though, sorry. Hehe... ._.'

That's fine by me.

I find the odd tiff with members amusing, but I don't have enough free time for an all out grudge. I'm a stickler for rules, but follow them and everything is gravy.

Jamer isn't a long-standing member. Sure, he deserves some respect for sticking it out through some of the shit he got, but he's not been here for as long as some of the others. Nice guy, but he's got no real power.