Lenny
2005-04-15, 11:08 AM
Many words in the english language are open to misinterpretation, particularly by non-native speakers. What follows is a selection of amusin examples of alternative translations.
allotment - Full of meaning.
autocue - Traffic jam.
autonomy - I should be recognized by him.
avoidable - What a bullfighter tries to do.
baloney - Where hemlines fall.
barbecue - Waiting in line for a haircut.
bicycle - Go shopping for two wheels.
burglarize - What a crook sees with.
campaign - Backache from sleeping too long in a tent.
contest - Exam with rigged questions.
counterfeiters - Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.
counter intelligence - Knowing how to knock down price tags.
control - A short, ugly prison mate.
dilate - Live long.
dogmatic - Run by canine power.
Eclipse - What a Cockney barber does for a living.
Enema - Not a friend.
Fortunate - Consumption of an expensive meal.
Gargoyle - Olive-flavoured mouthwash.
Heroes - What a guy in a boat does.
Isolate - Me not on time.
Knowledge - Nothing to stand on.
Legend - A foot.
Lymph - Walk with a lisp.
Munchkin - When Cannibals eat their family.
Nitrate - Cheaper than day rate.
Pecan - Container in which to urinate.
Protein - In favour of youth.
Relief - What trees do in the spring.
Support - Drink fortified wine.
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Taken from: "Eats, Shites and Leaves".
allotment - Full of meaning.
autocue - Traffic jam.
autonomy - I should be recognized by him.
avoidable - What a bullfighter tries to do.
baloney - Where hemlines fall.
barbecue - Waiting in line for a haircut.
bicycle - Go shopping for two wheels.
burglarize - What a crook sees with.
campaign - Backache from sleeping too long in a tent.
contest - Exam with rigged questions.
counterfeiters - Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.
counter intelligence - Knowing how to knock down price tags.
control - A short, ugly prison mate.
dilate - Live long.
dogmatic - Run by canine power.
Eclipse - What a Cockney barber does for a living.
Enema - Not a friend.
Fortunate - Consumption of an expensive meal.
Gargoyle - Olive-flavoured mouthwash.
Heroes - What a guy in a boat does.
Isolate - Me not on time.
Knowledge - Nothing to stand on.
Legend - A foot.
Lymph - Walk with a lisp.
Munchkin - When Cannibals eat their family.
Nitrate - Cheaper than day rate.
Pecan - Container in which to urinate.
Protein - In favour of youth.
Relief - What trees do in the spring.
Support - Drink fortified wine.
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Taken from: "Eats, Shites and Leaves".